


Do Try This At Home

by ObsidianRomance



Series: First Time for Everything [1]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Bottom Jensen, Drinking, Experimental Sex, First Time, Hand Jobs, J2, Lite Weed Use Referenced, M/M, Rimming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-10
Updated: 2014-05-10
Packaged: 2018-01-24 05:55:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,696
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1594061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ObsidianRomance/pseuds/ObsidianRomance
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jared and Jensen are roommates. When Jared's girlfriend dumps him, leaving him sexually frustrated, Jensen jumps in to help him out. They develop a habit of mutual masturbation which leads to something much more  and leaves both boys trying to figure out what this means for the terms of their relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Do Try This At Home

**Author's Note:**

  * For [demondetox](https://archiveofourown.org/users/demondetox/gifts).



> **Author's Note** : This was written for my wifey [Demondetox](http://archiveofourown.org/users/demondetox/pseuds/demondetox)'s birthday today. (Go wish her happy birthday) I love her dearly and I couldn't have gotten through a lot of the real life drama without her distracting me (usually with porn...but that is _perfect_ ). This story was based on her prompt where they wanted to boys to be high (from pot or whatnot) and maybe drunk. I shifted the prompt a bit but I hope you likes everything I have done with it. Also - I have never written anything with the use or recreational drugs, so it is just kind of glossed over. Hope it is okay.  
>  **Beta** : For part of it, [Demondetox](http://archiveofourown.org/users/demondetox/pseuds/demondetox) took a crack at this. The rest is a surprise for her.  
>  **Disclaimer** : All of this is fictional!

Originally, when Jared and Jensen decided to attend the same college, they’d figured it would be awesome. There was some type of comfort between the two of them in having each other there. They both weren’t too proud to admit that they were nervous about being away from home and everything they’d grown familiar with. While the world laid out in front of them was uncharted and new, they gave each other a sense of familiarity. Their whirlwind adventure into collegiate life became a whirlwind adventure in freshmen life that wasn’t as scary as they thought it would be. The change in their levels of freedom had been shocking but they adapted.

While freshmen year had been a blur, Jensen was in for an even bigger surprise by the time sophomore year was in full swing.

The moment Jared’s aunt said he and Jensen could spend their sophomore year of college renting out the second home she wouldn’t be using for the next ten months, Jensen felt like they’d hit the jackpot. They’d be able to get out of the dorms and their house would be party central.

Of course, with Jared as his best friend, Jensen knew they’d get into trouble together, the type of trouble he thought all hot blooded college boys should. He didn’t second guess renting the house together for a second.

What he didn’t figure into the equation was how living with Jared would actually play out, considering he knew his feelings for Jared had begun to morph and change into something more intense than just your average best friend vibes. Seeing Jared every day in and out, watching him walk around in barely anything, was catapulting those feelings to full on lust.

It was all fun and games till Jared peeled his clothing off or sauntered into the room with a towel way too small to be given the task of wrapping around Jared’s waist. It was times like those that Jensen couldn’t deny the obvious.

He had it bad for Jared and that wasn’t a good thing.

Honestly, Jensen hadn’t figured out his sexuality. Back home, in a small town with an even smaller dating pool, Jensen had barely bothered dating. Sure, he had girlfriends because that’s what everyone did. But it was high school silliness that neither party took seriously. Jared dated around too, probably less than Jensen, but they both blamed it on being consumed by sports and trying to get scholarships so they could get their asses out of their parents’ houses and see what the rest of the world had to offer them.

So while he hadn’t dated _any_ men, he’s starting to realize he definitely swings in Jared’s direction. It’s so evident that Jensen finds himself practically tripping over thoughts of getting his hands on Jared and figuring out how any type of sex between them will work.

Problem is, Jared’s busy flirting with everything filling a bra cup. He messed around with a few of them before finding himself an undisputable girlfriend and for the life of Jensen, he can’t figure out why. Jenna is a grade A bitch. Jensen supposes that she’s good looking, in that well-manicured way. She’s slender and pouty, but she yanks Jared around like he’s on a chain. She must have something else to offer that Jensen can’t understand because Jared keeps going back for more. He figures it’s “bitch-appeal” but Jensen doesn’t really understand that either. Jared is the nicest guy he’s ever met. Why he puts up with Jenna and her demands is beyond him.

So he’s left with two options: Move out and try to forget his raging hard-on for Jared or masturbate feverously.

He chooses masturbating.

It’s actually a lot harder than he thought it would be, considering the object of his desires is usually in the room. He supposes it would be pretty awkward if he dropped his pants and jerked himself off while looking directly at Jared during their waking hours. Instead, he has to be sneaky. The shower is one of the only times he gets some privacy, but even then, Jared’s been known to pop in on him just because he thinks it’s funny. Jensen blushes, which Jared thinks is from embarrassment, but it’s really from all the dirty thoughts and situations that enter his head.

He gets a little downtime in the house because of his and Jared’s alternating classes. It’s then that he does his most important homework, namely, figuring out how anal sex works. He gets himself an average flesh colored dildo and hides it in the back of his t-shirt drawer. When he’s alone, he uses it to work himself open.

He hates it.

At first…

Then he figures it out. It takes some practice but he starts loving the friction the slow drag across his stretched anal walls creates. He manages to angle his hips and hit his prostate with the rounded rubber tip, closing his eyes and wishing it was Jared. It provides some relief, but it’s not enough.

He finds himself to be even more of a love sick puppy when he realizes how much more he wants Jared now that he envisions sex with the man to be better than a rubber toy could ever imitate.

At the heart of things, he’s terrified. Jared is his best friend and this is a very, _very_ bad road to travel down. After years of friendship, he feels like nothing is worth jeopardizing their relationship.

He stops masturbating with thoughts of Jared in his head. He _tries_ to like Jenna (which doesn’t work) and agrees to go on a double date with one of her friends. Cheryl is a nice girl and everything, he even enjoys their conversation but he finds himself uncertain as to why she is friends with Jenna and if he could ever have a relationship with her. He thinks _no_ but he wishes the answer was _yes_.

Somehow, the semester’s worth of classes get the best of him and he pulls back from the world. He’s so focused on finishing up finals that he barely registers Jenna’s slowly diminishing presence in the house until Jared makes it glaringly obvious.

“Mother fucker!” Jared slams the front door after he storms through it. It’s evident he’s in a pissed off mood.

Jensen whirls around and catches sight of Jared’s furrowed brow. “What?” he asks as he approaches with caution.

“Jenna dumped me,” Jared practically growls out.

At first, a wave of relief rushes through Jensen. Then he remembers he is supposed to be a good friend and crosses his arms over his chest and snorts to join in with Jared’s annoyance. “She, _what_?”

“Jenna fucking dumped me. She said she found someone else who suits her better and fed me the whole ‘it’s not you, it’s me. We just aren’t a perfect match’ bull shit. After putting up with all her demands and doing everything she asked of me.” Jared storms around the kitchen and opens the refrigerator door, slamming it without removing anything only to open it again. “I figured this was going to happen, considering she hasn’t been putting out for a while and she seemed distant.”

Jensen can’t understand what must have gotten in Jenna’s head for her to believe she found someone better than Jared. His true feelings come out of his mouth in a tumble of words. “She’s a bitch.”

“Damn straight she is.” Giving up with the refrigerator, Jared drops all his weight and thuds onto the couch. Blindly searching out the remote and turning the television on. He appears to be staring at the television but Jensen can tell from the unfocused look that he’s staring beyond it in an attempt to hide his disappointment and unhappiness.

“Hey, Jay…she’s not worth it.” Jensen perches himself on the couch’s arm rest. He wants to say that Jenna is a user and an abuser. He’s seen the woman string Jared along, forcing him to put up with all of her demands and refusing to do anything Jared suggested. In his opinion, Jenna did Jared a favor. Still, he doesn’t like seeing Jared so conflicted. He’s doing a decent job of acting like he’s angry but Jensen knows he’s too sensitive for that to be the only thing he’s feeling. “You wanna talk about it?”

Jared raises an eyebrow. “ _Seriously_? You wanna talk about Jenna? You hate her….” Jared brushes Jensen off with a swipe of his hand. “Nah, it’s okay…I just…” He doesn’t finish the thought, choosing to chew his bottom lip instead and stare at the ceiling.

And, okay, Jensen realizes maybe he hadn’t been as sly about hiding his feelings about Jenna as he thought he had. That doesn’t mean he’s not willing to listen to what Jared has to say.

They stare in silence, Jared getting moodier by the second and Jensen knows he needs to take action. “I’ll be right back,” he says but doubts Jared hears him.

It takes him a half hour to procure the supplies he needs to enact Operation Get Jared Out of His Funk. He’s pretty impressed at how fast he could score some weed and two six packs. It seems to be long enough time, however, to turn Jared’s moodiness into misery. Jared looks far more miserable than he did before and he’s compulsively changing the channels.

“Give me that,” Jensen says as he snatches the remote from his friend and plops down on the coach beside him. “I’m in control. You’re not going to be doing much more than this,” he says as he places a cold beer bottle in Jared’s hand.

Jared stares at his hand as if trying to rationalize the loss of the remote and the gain of a beer. “Where did you get – ”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ve got more where that came from.” Jensen smirks. He likes when he can surprise Jared. “I’ve got other stuff too. But right now you are drinking _that_ and we are watching _this_.” He turns the channel until they settle on the horror channel. They’re playing a slasher flick marathon and Jensen can’t think of a better remedy for a bitchy ex-girlfriend than getting able to watch similar bitchy girlfriends get cut up on screen.

Jared finally smiles. It’s that clever little smile that lets them both know that they are finally on the same wavelength again.

“Fuck, yes.” Jared says. He smacks the beer top against the secondhand coffee table they had to buy and pops the cap. “I love _The House on Sorority Row_. So ridiculous.”

Jensen’s proud at that reaction and opens up his own beer. “To forgetting heinous bitches who you are too good for anyway,” he offers as a cheer and holds his bottle towards Jared.

Clinking their bottles together, Jared laughs. “I’ll drink to that.”

And drink they do.

They end up finishing off one six pack by the end of the movie and move on to smoking a quick joint before delving into the next one. Jared has completely mellowed out. He’s laughing and the anger is gone from his system, which is exactly what Jensen banked on.

It’s also kind of nice to spend the night in for a change, just the two of them. No bitchy girlfriends, no idiotic friends.

By the time the second movie is over, they are shit faced. They are completely wasted to the point that Jensen’s pretty sure the ending of _Friday the 13 th_ wasn’t supposed to be so hilarious but he can’t stop laughing. He laughs even more when Jared does a Jason Voorhees impression and almost tumbles over the couch.

They’re laughing like hyenas by the time they start wrestling for no good reason. Jensen’s hand lands on the remote and switches it several channels, landing on some smutty skin flick already in progress. There is a girl making breathy noises and some brute of a guy climbing over her.

The sounds of very distinct moans make the two of them freeze, heads snapping to face the screen.

“Oh my god! What is he doing?” Jared cocks his head and his eyes widen when he realizes there isn’t one ‘he’ but two of them. The girl between them is taking them both at the same time. “Fuck!” Jared says in awe.

Jensen’s interested too, on a purely logistic way. Still, porn wasn’t on the menu tonight and he scrambles to change the channel. Jared’s hand on his wrist stops him. “No, leave it,” Jared breathes.

So they leave it.

They end up back on the couch watching the porn with very little to say between them. Then again, what does one say while watching porn with your best friend?

Jared whines a bit, tongue licking against his lips. “Jenna would never try any of that. She was pretty vanilla. Same boring crap.” Jared bites his lip and groans when the scene shifts and the girl is giving a thorough blow job to one of the guys. “She never sucked my cock either.” He feels his dick twitch in his jeans and rolls his hips. In an attempt to hide his growing arousal from Jensen, he puts a palm over his crotch and gives a shaky laugh.

It’s pretty obvious to Jensen what is going on between his friend’s legs. They are both guys and Jensen knows how things downstairs work. He doesn’t know if it’s the weed, or the alcohol or the close proximity to Jared’s dick, but he figures he might as well go with it. “Hey, Jay, it’s…okay, you know? If you wanna whip it out. Nothing I haven’t seen before.” It’s true on multiple levels. Drunk Jared is a nudist Jared and Jensen’s had to pick up all those hung over pieces before. “We’re alone and shit, so,” Jensen makes a gesture towards Jared’s lap, indicating that he should get a move on it.

“You…you sure?” Jared asks but his fingers are already working with the zipper and dragging it down.

“Totally with you.” Jensen grins and gets his own dick out before Jared does. It should feel awkward but the buzz they have going does a good job of making sure that doesn’t happen. They both end up stroking themselves, tiny almost inaudible noises coming from their lips every few pumps of their hands. It’s what makes Jensen look down at Jared. He’s sure that there are unwritten rules to the whole ‘jerking off with your best friend thing” but he doesn’t give a shit. He catches sight of the way Jared’s working his own dick, fist twisting every now and then and fingers swiping over the head. Jensen has to be sneaky about it. He stares at the screen for a while before going back to what he’s much more interested in: Jared’s painfully hard cock. Every time he looks away from it and back at the screen, it’s still what he sees. He can’t help himself from imagining what the impressive doggie style scene playing out in front of them would be like if it stared him and Jared. He doesn’t care who fills which role but he wonders what it would feel like to fuck or be fucked that hard and desperate. Without warning, he comes harder than he can remember, lip bitten raw in an attempt to stifle the moan of Jared’s name that is playing in his brain.

Jared comes too, chest rising and falling more rapidly. Jensen catches sight of droplets of milky substance that escaped Jared’s fist and it makes his stomach twist up in want.

“Fuck, I needed that. It’s been a long time,” Jared says with a relieved sigh as he lets his head loll back onto the couch. His whole body is radiating contentment and he doesn’t bother to move or cover up; just sits there in his post orgasmic haze.

“Yeah, needed that,” Jensen mumbles dumbly. It takes all his willpower to get off the couch and away from temptation. Safely behind the bathroom door, he cleans himself off and wonders what type of can of worms he’d just opened.

***

Jensen thinks he is going to go to hell or at least die trying to figure out why he ever started jerking off with Jared.

Turns out, Jared is too downtrodden to go out after his breakup with Jenna, choosing instead to stay home, drink beer and watch cheesy movies.

After said movies, there usually comes equally cheesy porn.

Of course, Jensen is more than happy to fall into a routine that always ends up with them jerking off together likes it’s normal. The only part killing Jensen is that it’s becoming anything but normal for him. The want for Jared is growing in his gut and he can barely control it. He’s waiting for the other shoe to drop and knows the day will come when he does or says something that ruins the really dangerous come-fest they have going.

That day comes when Jared is more vocal than usual. It makes Jensen let out a wanton moan himself and he squeezes his eyes shut and hopes Jared was too caught up in his own pleasure to notice. When he opens them, Jared definitely isn’t noticing his face, but his stare is locked onto the pre-come Jensen’s dick has been drooling.

Jensen is sure it is just a coincidence; Jared didn’t mean to stare. But now Jensen’s brain is stuck on the thought that Jared’s interested in the sizable erection Jensen’s been working with and he moans again. Wishing he could instantly zap another beer into his system, Jensen reaches out and touches Jared’s dick. Jensen’s tentative at first, especially when Jared is so shocked that he pulls both of his own hands away from his dick and holds them up in surrender.

“Jen, what are you…?” Jared blinks through the pleasure clouding his eyes as they turn to confusion.

“Shh, just helping you out,” Jensen says and hates himself for sounding so scripted but he figures that’s much better than saying “I’m finally touching that gorgeous dick I’ve been fantasizing about for the past few months.”

Jared goes still but he doesn’t pull away from Jensen. If anything, he bucks up into Jensen’s fist when he starts fluctuating the pressure he’s encircling the organ with.

Jensen is so enthralled with the way Jared’s arousal feels in his hand that he almost doesn’t have to jerk himself off – almost. Jared’s hot and solid against his palm, and even though Jensen knows how a dick works, getting a chance to take Jared’s for a ride is new and exciting.

They fall into a rhythm, Jensen pumping both of them at the same time. Jared’s head falls back on the couch, his eyes closed, but his mouth is parted as he keeps letting out louder moans.

Jensen’s doing something right and that thought makes him come harder than with his own hand alone. Jensen keeps jacking Jared, but the man’s right behind him. Jared’s hips stutter and he bucks into Jensen’s hand before coming in uncontrolled splatters all over the immediate area.

“Uhh…that was…” Jared tires but ends with a shrug. His eyes look a little glossed over as he uncurls Jensen’s hand from around his dick and returns it to its owner.

“Sorry, I…”

“No, it’s cool man. Thank for the _help_.” Jared tucks himself into his pants before getting up to stretch. “I gotta, umm, take a shower. Early class tomorrow and all.” Scratching at the back of his head, he gives a friendly smile and nervous lick of his lips before turning to walk away.

Wanting to kick himself in the head, Jensen mutters every curse he knows. He can’t believe he’s pining away after his straight best friend. How he became such a cliché is beyond him. This is not who he is. He’s just as energetic and goofy as Jared, albeit in different ways. They both have the type of grounded nature that makes them dream big but understand the limits of their dreams. He _should not_ be rubbing stray drops of Jared’s come between his thumb and forefinger and wondering what it will taste like.

***

Things with Jared have been awkward. Even though Jared says he’s been busy getting ready for finals, Jensen senses there is something else going on.

He thinks it has everything to do with the hand-job he gave him and nothing to do with GPA.

That’s why, when he settles onto the couch at their usual time, Jensen is thoroughly surprised to see Jared walk into the room and offer him an open beer.

He’s even more surprised when he hears Jared’s zipper tugging down.

Though there was a blip in their radar, their weekly jerk off session has never been missed.

Jensen doesn’t touch Jared again, but they both steal glances at each other’s dicks and pretend that they’re not.

The end of the semester comes but they decide to stay in town, considering the house is theirs for the whole school year, breaks included.

Without school to get in the way, Jared suggests they up their “jerk off date” to twice a week. Of course, he’s all good natured and teasing about it but Jensen’s mouth goes dry at the thought of having to survive two sessions a week of trying to control himself from getting his hands on Jared.

He assumes that the double dose of Jared’s dick is what does him in.

Jared picked the porn they are watching, and while Jensen’s not into heterosexual porn, it doesn’t seem to matter much. He always ends up picturing the two of them in action instead and it gets him off every time.

The scene tonight has a woman deep throating a guy and Jensen has to give her props; she looks like she is doing a fantastic job. He knows they are acting to some extent but one cannot get that much dick in his or her mouth without some skill level.

“Damn,” Jared whimpers. He looks more disappointed than turned on. “Jenna never went down on me. Period. But that? I don’t think anyone’s ever done anything close to _that_ to me.”

Jensen raises an eyebrow. He’s semi hard and his brain is halfway to picturing what Jared would look like on his knees. “Well, Jenna was a bitch, remember?”

Stroking himself lazily, Jared has that longing look in his eyes. “Yeah, but…I don’t even mean Jenna. No one’s done that for me.”

“Ever?” Jensen asks. Hell, he’s been on the receiving end of some stellar blow jobs and he knows what he likes. He figures it isn’t that hard to apply that to someone else and his mouth waters at the thought of swallowing Jared whole. He hasn’t even noticed when that thought takes hold but it is there and Jensen smacks his lips.

“Ever.” Jared clarifies with a shy shake of his head. Shrugging, he avoids Jensen’s eyes in fear that his friend will think him pathetic. It’s a stupid challenge to his manliness but sometimes it’s hard for Jared to get out of the stigma that men are judged by their sexual encounters.

For a brief second, Jensen thinks he can stop himself. As soon as he catches the forlorn look in Jared’s eyes coupled with the want he holds for the deep throating going down on screen, the odds are against him. He’s on his knees so fast that he should win a medal, pushing Jared’s thighs open wider and hooking him under the knees so he can tug him towards the edge of the couch.

“Jen!” Jared squawks.

Jensen doesn’t pay him any attention. He licks his lips, gets a grip on Jared’s dick and pumps it in his fist several times before holding it steady so he can roll his tongue around the tip. The taste of Jared’s skin and pre-come explodes on his tongue and he is so caught up in it that he can’t stop licking the man like a lollipop. But Jared didn’t want licking; he wanted deep throating. Sending up a prayer to the porn gods, Jensen hopes he doesn’t fuck this up. He hopes he doesn’t make a fool of himself after putting their friendship on the line.

“Jen, you…” Jared looks down at the man between his legs and his heart clenches up. Adrenaline rushes though him and he feels a bit light headed.

Rolling his eyes up to look at Jared, Jensen swallows the man’s dick in one shot. It’s almost too perfect to be Jensen’s first time doing this but he isn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. Though it is hard to breathe and figure out, Jensen manages to stop himself from gagging when the tip of Jared’s dick hits the back of his throat. He keeps up the action, pulling Jared out of his mouth with a loud slurping noise and sucking him back down again.

“Oh, my god! Jensen!” Jared’s hands find their way to the back of Jensen’s skull on autopilot. He runs his fingers through the short hair there, anchoring them and giving encouraging pressure to Jensen’s head as he bobs his mouth up and down on his dick. “Oh _yes_ ,” Jared hisses in pleasure.

Jensen keeps going. Suddenly the room is bursting with moans and gasps of pleasure. Jared is being _loud_ and the best part is, he keeps saying Jensen’s name. It makes Jensen leak in his own jeans. He can’t believe this is happening to him. Nerves make him shiver but he keeps working to bring Jared to orgasm. There is fear building up that this moment will never happen again, and that hurts. Somewhere along the way, he’s fallen hard for Jared and he doesn’t want this to be a onetime thing.

It hurts to want something and know you can’t have it.

Jensen’s eyes tear up and he’s glad Jared can’t see it.

Jared bites his lip as the realization that he is going to come – _soon_ – hits him. He wants to draw everything out because it is the best damn blow job he could ever ask for. Jensen’s talented lips feel amazing wrapped around his dick and he wants to shoot his load straight down the man’s throat so he can savor every second he’s in Jensen’s mouth. “Fuck! Jensen! Gonna come!” Even though he wants Jensen to swallow him down, he feels he should give him fair warning in case the feeling isn’t mutual.

Jensen makes a muffled encouraging sound around Jared’s dick. He wants to taste Jared, fully and completely. He’s happy to have Jared come in his mouth, despite the fact that it takes him a minute to master swallowing and breathing. He’s not graceful about it but he doesn’t make much of a mess and he is left with the salty taste of Jared on his lips and panting that sounds like Jared enjoyed the ride. The problem is, Jensen doesn’t know what to do with himself. He can’t stay on his knees with Jared’s dick in his mouth forever – as tempting as that sounds.

Instead, he bolts. He tries to give a reassuring smile to Jared to let him know that everything is okay, but he bolts to the bathroom, rinsing his mouth out because as much as he wanted to taste Jared, he knows he is never going to get the man out of his head if he can’t get him out of his mouth. When he comes out of the bathroom, Jared is waiting for him.

“Hey, Jen – ”

Jensen can’t hear this right now. He puts up a palm and brushes past him. “It was a mistake, Jared. Okay? Just…I just need to get some air.”

Jared lets him go but he wasn’t going to say that it was a mistake. Not at all. He was going to say it was the single best sexual experience that he’s ever had in his life. And if it was with Jensen? Well, then he’s just doubly blessed because as messy and confusing as that whole revelation is, it doesn’t seem that odd to him.

***

The thing about living with the person you are one hundred percent sure that you are madly and truly in love with, they don’t go away when you need to think about anything but them.

Jensen’s so fucked up in the head that he’s pretty sure a psychologist could write a case study about him.

Jared has been….he’s been pretty great. He stocked the fridge with all the crappy foods he likes and even did the laundry – both of theirs. It’s like he’s trying to make up for doing something wrong.

Jensen doesn’t give it too much thought.

They fall into their normal routine again. There are a few weeks before the spring semester starts up again and Jensen wants to enjoy it as much as possible. They haven’t jerked off together in a few days and he wonders if they can take a step backwards, back before the blow job and hand job. Maybe things got too confusing between them. If they kept things simple and had rules, this jerking off date thing they were doing could work. It’s torture for Jensen but it is more action than he’s been getting.

That was the plan, but Jensen’s head spins when the porn barely starts and Jared has him shoved up against the couch’s back. He thinks he is going to get punched or threatened but Jensen is treated to Jared’s tongue coasting over his lips. They are frozen in the moment, faces hovering over one another’s, before Jared places a ghost of a kiss to Jensen’s lips and falls back onto the couch like nothing happened.

Jensen isn’t sure anything did happen. Breathing and pulse quickened, Jensen tries to compose himself.

He fails.

He ends up crawling over Jared’s lap, legs straddling the man. His fingers are a fumbling mess but he manages to free Jared’s cock, all while fucking his tongue into the inside of the man’s mouth. They end up kissing like teenagers, messy, uncoordinated and perfect. Jensen can’t believe it when Jared reaches up to cup his jaw with both hands and keeps their connection.

“Jared,” Jensen breathes out, unable to come up with a more complex sentence.

“Shh,” Jared tugs Jensen closer. Their teeth clash and it takes him a minute to figure out just how to tilt his head, how to work their lips and how to make sure their noses aren’t getting in the way. When he does, it’s intoxicating. They can’t calm their kisses down to anything less than desperate.

Jensen fights for dominance of the kiss. He licks his tongue inside the hot confines of Jared’s mouth and twists his hand into the opening of the man’s jeans. It’s more than reassuring when he finds Jared to be hard and dripping. Maybe…just maybe…Jared wants _this_ as much as Jensen does.

Their kisses grow louder as they both let moans escape into each other’s mouths.

Pretty soon, they are rocking against each other, bodies moving in time with their new battle for control over the kiss. They nip and suck at each other’s lips, pulling apart to catch their breath but getting distracted by the need to kiss along each other’s jawline and suck gently on pulse points.

Kissing a man is different than kissing a girl. Jensen’s aware of that straight away. Jared is solid and steady, and he loves the way he pushes back. The stubble against his own is something Jensen’s never felt but he purrs and realizes he’s thinking out loud. “I’ve never kissed a man before.” With the words hanging between them, Jensen thinks they sound pathetic. What he and Jared have been doing is much more than a simple kiss. It’s more than just a sexual act and he wonders if there is even a word in the dictionary that could sum it up.

“I never have either.” Jared puts his hands on Jensen’s hips and pulls him down. “Never kissed like this with Jenna.” Sighing lustily, Jared demonstrates just how intense their kisses have been. He captures Jensen’s lips and leaves him breathless. “Know what else I’ve never done with Jenna?”

Heart thrumming, Jensen’s voice quivers when he dares to ask, “what?”

“Really _fuck_. You know what I mean? Fuck hard and rough. It was always gentle, missionary, and boring. There was no passion. It had to be calculated and careful. Not genuine and primal.”

Jensen gulps. The sound echoes in the silence between them. He wonders if Jared understands just what type of challenge he’s presenting Jensen with. He locks eyes with Jared and knows the man can read how hungry he is for him.

“Maybe I was paired up with the wrong Jen,” Jared says with a smirk before grabbing Jensen by the back of the neck and kissing any retort out of him.

“Oh god, Jared. Bed…bedroom…whatever…” Jensen almost falls backwards when he gets to his feet. He tries to keep kissing Jared and jerking his dick lazily but he can’t do everything at once. He settles for pulling Jared into his room and shoving him on the bed. After all the buildup and tip toeing, he goes for it. He’s straddling Jared’s crotch again while leaning down to kiss him. Each kiss is more bruising than the last and he doesn’t care how swollen his lips will be tomorrow, he wants more.

They are a mess of limbs as they try to get rid of clothing. For as many times as they have achieved orgasm side by side, they have never seen anything but each other’s dicks while doing so. It’s a new adventure in incoordination and even with his nerves, Jensen has to laugh when Jared gets tangled up in his t-shirt.

There are a million things that go left unsaid between them because they both don’t know where to start and have no time to deal with the awkward conversations that are in store for them.

Jared smiles up at Jensen, shaking his head like the idiot he’s been for the last few months. “Jen…you….here all this time and I….” He gets caught up in trying to say something important and his eyes plead with Jensen for help.

“Yeah…well…I didn’t think we were on the same wavelength.” Jensen rolls his hips down, deliberately brushing against Jared’s dick. “Apparently we are. And Jay?”

“Hmm?”

Leaning in close to Jared’s ear, Jensen whispers, “With me, you don’t have to hold back. I can handle you.”

The words go straight to Jared’s dick. He shivers and with a needy pitch forward, he goes back to kissing Jensen. He wants so much more but the main problem is figuring out how to achieve that. Kissing is something they both have a firm grasp on but he has no idea how they are going to factor in actual penetrative sex to whatever they have going on. Jared hasn’t been this nervous since…ever.

Jensen senses the shift in Jared’s confidence and his brain immediately points towards it being something he did. But Jared’s hands are still holding him tight and they are still rutting against each other with dual hard-ons. He doesn’t want to fuck this up. It’s what he’s been dreaming about but it is more complicated now that it is real.

Jensen’s in love with Jared. It’s as simple – or complicated – as that.

The problem is, Jensen’s heart is going to break no matter what. If Jared doesn’t want anything more than sex from him, Jensen is going to shatter. And if Jensen decides to call this off now, their friendship is too damaged.

Love and lust make Jensen’s brain cloudy even though he’s completely sober. Deciding that ignorance is bliss, Jensen lets the emotions take him away and he goes limp in Jared’s hold, letting the man do with him what he wants.

And what Jared wants, he can’t figure out how to get.

“Umm, Jen…” Jared says, sounding miles away and years younger. “I…um…so…what now?”

“Huh?”

“Well…you said you could handle me. I…I never had sex with a guy.” Jared bites his lip, looking sheepish and kissably adorable. “I know how it works and all…but…you know…who is the fuckee and the fucker?”

If Jensen wasn’t so nervous himself, he would have laughed. “Here,” Jensen says as he reaches over Jared towards his nightstand. “I’ve got condoms and lube. I’ve been…well…practicing on myself for a while. I figure it will be easier if you fuck me.” Realizing he sounds too clinical about the whole thing, Jensen shoves down his nerves and lets the desire flood his voice. “I _want_ you to fuck me. Can you do that?” The only response Jensen catches is the bob of Jared’s Adam’s apple and slight nod of his head. “Good.” Jensen isn’t in the mood to let the man change his mind. He coats his own fingers with lube and makes it obvious that he’s going to prep himself. “Kiss me,” he demands and moans when Jared does so with zeal.

It’s almost magical. Even though Jensen’s using his own fingers, it’s better than any of the other times he practiced because Jared is an actual participant of the bedroom activities this time. He’s quick but thorough, rolling a condom down Jared’s dick and getting up on his hands and knees. As much as he’d love to watch Jared’s face while he lets the man fuck him, Jensen isn’t sure he could handle that type of connection with the uncertainty of it ever happening again. He was already playing with fire but this was the safest option.

“You sure?” Jared asks as he gets up on his knees behind Jensen and positions himself to spread Jensen’s ass cheeks wide.

“Fuck me.” Jensen demands. “Like I said, I can take it.” He’s thankful that the uncertainty in his voice doesn’t come though. He’s never done this and he has no idea what he is in for. Still, he wants it.

“Okay,” Jared says, and nudges forward. There is much more resistance than Jared’s ever experienced before but tight heat envelopes him. It’s weird...similar to other experiences he’s had but worlds away when he looks down and sees the dip of Jensen’s spine and hears something that sounds like a squeak come out of Jensen’s mouth. “You okay?”

“Hhhuh…yeah. Just…” Jensen isn’t sure how to end that sentence. Jared’s big but he’s also _Jared_. Jensen’s head is spinning from more than just discomfort; it is the realization that Jared is finally inside him. “Keep going.”

“Nnngh,” Jared bites his lips and shoves forward another inch. Jensen is _tight_. It’s better than anything he’s had before, and he feels like an idiot because it’s not the first time Jensen is to blame for that. He can’t believe that these experiences were sitting right in front of him for so long but, in the back of his head, he thinks that maybe he just wasn’t ready for them yet. Shuffling forward on his knees, he curls his hands around Jensen’s hips and sinks in to the hilt. “Ohh, Jen,” he breathes out on a sigh.

Mouth falling open, Jensen jolts forward at the feeling of Jared bottoming out. It’s intense and he needs something more to get his brain off of the discomfort. Pushing past it and picking up on the only porn lines he can remember, Jensen moans. “Come on. What’re you waiting for? Fuck me.”

Jared doesn’t need to be told twice. He pulls out slowly, sinks in just as slow and then abandons his patience. His hips snap forward, getting lost in Jensen and sending his mind into orbit. It’s way better than he thought sex with another man could be but maybe that’s because it’s Jensen he’s dealing with. “Fuck…” His eyes flutter and he gets a better grip on Jensen, pulling the man back with each forward thrust.

A punch of air leaves Jensen’s throat each and every single time Jared bottoms out. He can barely get enough oxygen in his brain to help him think straight. It’s not exactly good in a physical sense but emotionally it is everything. Hearing Jared move behind him, letting out pants and grunts, is enough to keep his arousal strong.

They build up a quick and dirty pace. Jared is screwing Jensen’s brains out, pummeling him without much direction until the tip of his dick hits something inside the man that makes Jensen shout.

“Jared!” Clenching the bed sheets with white knuckles, stars explode on the back of Jensen’s eyelids.

“Jen, wha-”

“Do that again!” Jensen demands. It takes Jared a few tries but eventually he hits Jensen’s prostate again and Jensen’s whole body shivers. He feels everything bubbling over and his brain loses control over his mouth as Jared starts fucking him with more determination. “Oh, fuck! Jared! I wanted this so bad. So long. Wanted to feel you fucking me like this. Nnngh!” Eyes rolling back, he feels his balls drawing up. The moments of discomfort in the past, Jensen is finding himself hurdling towards climax faster than he planned. What slows it down a bit is Jared’s hips picking up a slower, unsteady rhythm. “Jared?” Jensen dares to question.

“You did?” Jared’s heart skips a beat in his chest. He knows Jensen’s words were genuine. Weird things are happening in his head and the fact that he was immediately happy over Jensen’s words needs some figuring out. Still, he’s not really freaked out by it. It seems more like the natural progression of things.

“Huh?” Jensen says stupidly.

“You wanted me to fuck you for a long time?”

“Yeah…I…” A blush rushes to Jensen’s face and he wiggles his ass in an attempt to get Jared’s brain back onto the sex train and off the embarrassing Jensen train.

It seems to work because Jared starts fucking him again but he doesn’t stop talking, each word spaced out by a loud exhale. “I think….me too. Me too. I always loved you…you know that. I just didn’t know…well…this? I didn’t know. I didn’t think we could work like this…but…fuck, Jen. You are so good.”

Heart clenching up, Jensen’s whole body does the same. He can tell from the moan Jared lets out, that he’s gone tighter around his dick. “Don’t mess with me, Jared.”

“Not. Not messin’, Jen.”

The words open up a flood gate. Both men become moaning, sweaty messes. Jensen takes everything that Jared gives him and then begs for more.

They may have had a hard time figuring out how to get started but they end with a bang.

Jensen comes first, aided by his own fist. There are shouts of adoration and pleasure on his tongue and he coaxes Jared to his own orgasm, baiting him with dares and orders. It doesn’t take long, and soon Jared’s a babbling mess, filling the condom with pulses of come and littering Jensen’s shoulder blades with sloppy kisses.

Despite the revelations between them, it is awkward when the afterglow fades.

They both don’t cuddle each other, which Jared finds oddly refreshing because he’s not quite sure how to go about that. They just went from being the type of friends who punch each other as a show affection to hot and sweaty sex. He wants to get his hands on Jensen but he’s glad they can still look so content without the awkwardness of trying to figure out who the little spoon is.

Instead, they lay in the bed and stare at the ceiling.

“So…” Jared starts.

“So?”

“So, we have a lot of porn inspiration to reenact. I…I just wanted to let you know that I’m game if you are.” Jared lets out a breathless laugh and turns to lock eyes with Jensen.

Jensen freezes for a moment, unsure if what just happened to them was based purely on sex.

Jared catches it. “Easy, Jen. I’d also like to take you out. You know…something that doesn’t involve our couch, beer, and porn. I mean, those things are nice too, but I want more than that in a relationship so if that’s a problem with you – ” Jared’s words are cut off by Jensen’s lips.

They have a hundred different things to try and figure out, but those can wait for another day.

Jensen figures they could only handle one life changing decision at a time and that is good enough for him.


	2. Hands On Lesson *bonus porn*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bonus porn from Jared's POV

Jared isn’t sure how a lot of things are going to work between him and Jensen. They’ve kind of catapulted their relationship to another mile marker and it seems to have been the only one missing from their lives.

They already live together, know everything about each other, know each other’s family and friends, and can’t seemingly function without each other.

Sex and figuring out how to have an emotional relationship are the only two items left on the table.

And it’s weird because, Jensen is _Jensen_.

Jared is stuck because his best friend is most definitely a man and Jared’s hung up on that. It’s not that he’s uncomfortable about the fact that he’s quickly falling head over heels for a man, it’s that Jared really has no idea what to do with one, romantically. He’s done some research on the sly but he doesn’t want to do anything that makes Jensen feel uncomfortable and he definitely doesn’t want to insult Jensen by not treating him like the man he is. Jared’s used to soft, feminine things in his bed, which Jensen definitely isn’t. It thrills him in a way, but it also leaves him feeling lost.

His brilliant idea is to continue with their mutual masturbation dates. The only difference is that now, Jared’s jerking Jensen off as well. It’s educational, in a sense. He gets a feel for Jensen’s dick. It’s so much different than his own but he understands how it work; he knows how to make Jensen feel good.

Also educational is the gay porn they’re watching. Jared popped the DVD in without Jensen looking, earning him a little squeak of surprise when the real action gets going. The best part is, Jensen’s not really looking at the screen. Instead, there is a flush breaking out across his bare chest and his eyes are heavy with lust as he stares at Jared. Jared feels like the most important being on the planet and he can’t lie by saying that doesn’t puff him up with pride.

With Jensen’s dick hard and hot in Jared’s fist, Jared looks at the television. On screen, one man is swallowing down the other’s dick. Jared’s not too sure about that. He _wants_ to do that to Jensen; hell, the man deserves it after the awesome deep throating he’d done to Jared. It’s just, Jared has no idea _how_ to do that. He’s never had a dick in his mouth and Jensen’s cock looks pretty intimidating. He’s terrified to go _there_ and mess things up. So he keeps doing exactly what he’s doing – jerking Jensen off.

They make out for a while, Jared moaning into Jensen’s mouth when the man dips his hand a bit lower to fondle Jared’s balls. It’s enough to make Jared break for air. In the process, he catches what’s happening in the porn. The scene has progressed to the point where one man has the other pressed up against the wall. He’s on his knees, using both hands to spread the man’s ass cheeks and lick the furled muscle there.

 _That_ , looks like something Jared can handle. He’s gone down on girls before, and while he’s not calling Jensen a girl, he’s pretty sure the process isn’t that different.

Licking his lips nervously, he leans over and nuzzles Jensen’s ear, kissing his jaw line. “Jen?”

A slightly dazed quality to his voice, Jensen answers with a, “Hmm?”

“I wanna try something. Can you…uhh, can you get up?” Jared’s stomach jumps with nerves but eating Jensen out can’t be _that_ hard. The guy on the porn made it look pretty easy and the other man was loud enough to let everyone know he was enjoying it.

Jensen gives Jared a skeptical look. Being that they are both already nude, he makes a purposeful slow drag of his eyes over Jared’s body. With a satisfied smirk, he stands up.

Jared may have been overeager to throw his plan into action because he ends up attacking Jensen, spinning the man to face the couch and sending Jensen to pitch forward. Jensen catches himself on the back of the couch, but it leaves his ass for the taking and earns a hungry stare from Jared, who fumbles to do _anything_ , his hands clumsy as he pulls Jensen’s cheeks apart and licks over the furled muscle there.

“Jared, what the hell!” He whips his head around but a moan snuffs out any further complaints from Jensen. His knees go weak the instant he feels Jared’s wet tongue lick at him.

Feeling that maybe he underestimated how different eating Jensen out would be, Jared gets stuck lapping little stripes over Jensen’s anus. Jensen doesn’t seem to mind; in fact, he let out a deeper moan that makes Jared’s dick dribble pre-come. Getting comfortable with the act, Jared situates himself more directly between Jensen’s legs and starts making exploratory jabs with his tongue. He feels the muscle give and allow him access. When he pulls away, he feels it contract and search for more attention, clearly missing Jared’s ministrations. Squeezing the meat of Jensen’s ass, he lets out a muffled growl and plunders further into Jensen’s anus, licking it open with sloppy moves of his tongue and moments of teasing sucking. He has little clue as to how Jensen is holding up but the breathy sighs and the way his moans catch at the end give him the idea the he is enjoying it.

“Jared! Ugh! I’m…” Jensen lets out a needy moan and his legs shake. “Gonna…fuck…Jared, I’m gonna come.”

The fact surprises Jared but he remembers just how long he’s kept his boyfriend – god, boyfriends? Is that what they are? The terms feels too insignificant to label what they have – on the edge. He’s been toying with Jensen for almost 45 minutes. It’s no wonder he is falling apart.

When Jensen shouts again, Jared can tell by the way his body shivers and tenses that he is coming. Throughout the orgasm, Jared keeps up his assault on Jensen’s anus, sneaking a finger in beside his tongue to explore the hole for himself. It is tight but Jared’s saliva makes it an easy push.

All Jensen seems able to do is let his head hang down, still holding himself up but showing clear evidence of exertion. He pants in an attempt to get his breath back but doesn’t move; allowing instead for Jared to take his time figuring just how he works.

Jared appreciates it. The orgasm left Jensen relaxed and unguarded. It’s the perfect time for Jared to learn how to prep Jensen with his own fingers. Jensen had been doing a good job of dealing with the issue himself but Jared _wants_ to. He wants to do a lot of things, maybe switching places with Jensen one day, but baby steps are good. He has all the time he needs to work Jensen open and watch how the man’s anus reacts. It’s interesting but also starting to turn Jared on further because he keeps picturing what Jensen looks like when Jared’s dick is spreading him wide instead of his finger.

“Jared,” Jensen huffs out, eyes trying to focus. “Kinda uncomfortable on the couch. Can we – nngh,” Jensen moans and pushes back on Jared’s fingers. “Can we take this to a bedroom?”

“Yeah. We should do that.” Jared pulls away, helping Jensen into a standing position.

Jensen is quick to turn around. “Hey,” he says with an afterglow smile and a love drunk look on his face. He bites his lip before leaning forward and kissing Jared.

Jared hesitates with the kiss for a moment. Jensen’s insistent, however, and Jared gives in. He’s still nervous about the rim job he just serviced Jensen with and that makes his self-consciousness come out. “Was that…that okay? I do it right?”

“Right?” Jensen says with confusion before understanding washes over his face. “I don’t know what ‘right’ is but what you did had me coming like a faucet. So, yeah, I’d say you did more than okay.” He kisses Jared again before pulling away and tugging his arm. “Come on. Bed! You. Me. You’re dick in my ass.”

“I like the sound of that.” Jared pushes Jensen faster. They tumble into his room and fall on the bed in a heap. There is kissing and nipping, but they are done with foreplay. That’s evident by the very demanding way Jensen slaps a condom and lube into Jared’s hand.

Jared sheaths up and slathers his dick and Jensen’s opening with lube. Jensen is being impatient, urging him to hurry up and he keeps trying to pull Jared closer by wrapping his legs around the man’s waist. They start kissing again, Jared crawling between Jensen’s legs and forcing him on his back. They end up with their chest pressed flush to one another’s. It makes Jared nervous all over again. They’ve done this before but he never got to look at Jensen’s face. Now he can’t look anywhere but.

Pushing into Jensen is similar to last time. It’s hot and tight and feels amazing. The only problem is, Jensen’s face looks tense, like the moment hurts. “Jen?” Jared asks in concern.

“I’m good. It just…burns a bit. It’s okay. Want it. Trust me.” There is an effort to relax his face but Jensen still looks uncomfortable.

“Try bearing down,” Jared says casually.

“What?”

“Try bearing down when I push in. It’ll help.” Jared flushes and bites his lip. “I…uh…did some research and…yeah…try bearing down.” Jared looks at Jensen to see a wash of adoration and sentiment on his face and realizes doing some research was a better idea than he thought. Jensen listens and things actually do go smoother.

As soon as Jared’s in, he stays there, kissing up and down Jensen’s neck. He can feel Jensen’s heart thumping against his chest and Jared’s sure the same is true on Jensen’s part.

Jensen flutters his eyes open at Jared and lets out a breath. “So…we’re doing this?”

“Oh, yeah. Definitely doing this.” Jared proves his point by catching Jensen’s lips and kissing him deeply as he starts to move.

The rest of their coupling is just as quick as it was the first time. Jared feels it’s a bit embarrassing but this sex thing is new and exciting. They’ve got time to build up their endurance. Right now, Jared wants to fuck Jensen so that the man sees stars, maybe even comes again.

They become a sweaty mess of panting and trying to grip onto each other. Jared wants more and deeper, making him guess at how things will play out when he hooks Jensen’s legs over his shoulder.

“Holy shit!” Jensen cries out as Jared uses the new angle to sink down. His eyes are blown wide and he chokes on a breath. “Fuck, that’s –”

“Good?”

“Fan-fucking-tastic.” Jensen curls his toes and closes his eyes as Jared does it again.

It _is_ fan-fucking-tastic. Jared wants to get as much of that feeling as possible. Jensen feels so amazing around him and the fact that he’s so reactive to everything Jared does makes him addictive. Even though Jared’s new at this, so is Jensen, and they’ve been figuring things out on their own. It’s been a more than enjoyable experience.

“Harder, Jare,” Jensen pleads, hips arching off the bed enough to give Jared the point.

Feeling Jensen’s renewed arousal between them, Jared grins like a Cheshire car and turns his head to press a kiss onto the leg thrown over his shoulder. He pumps his hips faster, snaking a hand between them to jerk Jensen off.

The rest is fast and messy. Jensen comes first and the look on his face is enough to have Jared chasing after him.

They both land in an uncomfortable pile of limbs and gasps for breath. Jensen gets his wits about him first and hisses as he shifts so that Jared slips out of him. Scrambling, he turns Jared onto his side, fitting his own body to mold along Jared’s spine so that it’s with Jensen’s chest. He mumbles something into the nape of Jared’s neck but Jared doesn’t catch it. The words don’t really matter, the gesture was soft and sweet enough for Jared to get the gist.

“So I’m the little spoon?” Jared says with a breathy laugh.

“Tonight you are. Don’t fight me over it.” Jensen wraps a strong arm around Jared’s waist and tugs them closer.

“No arguing. Just saying.” Reaching back, Jared finds Jensen’s hip and rests his hand there. They are quite for a moment before Jared’s thought manifest themselves on his lips. “Jen…You know I love you, right?”

“Yeah, I do.” Jensen puts a hand over the one Jared has on his hip and squeezes it. “I love you too. And tomorrow you can be the big spoon.”

It’s the silliest way to show adoration but it makes Jared’s heart flutter because Jensen _does_ love him. He knows it. They’ve always loved each other, they’ve just found new forms of love. And tomorrow, when he’s the big spoon, he’s going to make sure to kiss every inch of Jensen’s neck and back, maybe give some of his own loving mumbled words. He’ll make sure Jensen knows how special he is to Jared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...I am alive. I know there has been radio silence on my part! I have been busy with life. Aside from some drama at work and other stuff, my uncle (who I care for, in case you don't know) took a turn for the worse. His cancer has spread to his skull, the treatments are not working, and it might be in his brain. We are looking at a limited live expectancy. So...forgive me for being absent. Also - I am trying to get two challenge fics done. If I have my way, you will have two 50K+ plus fics to read by the end of the month. XOXO Much love!


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